Tell me what you think.
A Brave New World
His had been an ordinary life. He’d been to school, bummed through university, even found himself in a job he liked, all thanks to his Dad’s contacts. He’d never had to fight for anything, or even try very hard. Everyone told him he could do so much more if he tried and sometimes he even believed them. He’d always planned to do something with his life, something exciting, but then he went back to work on Monday and put it off for another week. He’d promise himself that one day he really would make his Mum proud. Not just because he didn’t mess things up and was “a good boy”, but because he’d really done something extraordinary.
Now it looked like he’d left it too late. It had all taken a while to sink in. He’d seen it happen to a lot of others, sure, but when it happened to him he really couldn’t accept it. It was all as if he was watching it from a distance. It had been an ordinary foraging trip and nothing much seemed to be about. All of a sudden a huge group of them had appeared from nowhere. He’d seen himself get bitten in the mad rush to get away. Somehow he’d fended it off; well, kicked it in the face really, as they scrambled up the ladder to safety; and tried to put it out of his mind. No-one else had seen, and now he was beginning to think that wasn’t such a good thing. Everyone had been so worried about stopping them getting up after them, and getting further away, so the hordes of them that kept arriving were not around a building they were attempting to live in. Then there was crisis after crisis, like when they’d run out of water and then again when they’d run out of food. They must have covered half the city on the rooftops. Now it had all settled down a bit and Danny had time to think.
They’d lost a few people along the way, but usually they were just dragged off. It was only recently that they were realising that a bite was not just a bite. A little girl had been bitten a couple weeks ago and it had been horrible. No-one wanted to admit that something was wrong, that she wasn’t just dieing; she was changing. They’d kept her locked in one of the downstairs rooms so they couldn’t hear her screaming. It was an odd sort of blessing, that the rest of her family were already dead. Someone, Danny still didn’t know who, had let her out at the bottom of the building. A risky move at any time. Danny’d seen her footsteps in the mud outside the door. No-one talked about her again after that.
It really was turning into some sort of horror movie. Everyone kept an eye on everyone else for “The Signs”. No-one mentioned anyone, but everyone knew what was going on. It was odd seeing how people behaved when they were trying to look normal. There’d been a few times when someone had been suspected; sometimes it went a bit far and fights broke out. They’d been lucky since the girl though. No-one had been hurt. The funny thing was Danny’d been bitten weeks ago and still showed none of “The Signs”. What’s more his arm hurt like hell and didn’t look like it was going to let up. One of the girls had done some first aid on him (he’d said he’d caught his arm on a nail when they’d been running away), but it didn’t seem to have made any difference. Far from healing, his arm was going grey and his fingers on that hand were getting stiffer. Sooner or later he was going to have to tell someone. Perhaps later. After all, he felt fine apart from the arm.
He’d found himself taking more risks lately. He’d never been a risk-taker before, it was just he was so hungry. He’d never really gone out of his way to be a good person, but he couldn’t betray these people. They were his friends, well, some of them anyway, and it didn’t seem right to eat all their food. He’d tried to put up with it at first, but it had built and built until he could no longer stand it. There was a gnawing pain in his stomach that he just had to fill. He couldn’t think about anything else. He couldn’t concentrate. Even the others had started to notice. He didn’t want to give them an excuse to find out about his arm. Unlike the others, he did have something to hide. That was that. He started to steal out at night and find food. He went to places the others wouldn’t dare so he wouldn’t harm the chances of the group. He went to the supermarkets that had been crawling with them. To his joy he found them empty, but, when he suggested to the others to try a couple again, just to see, they’d reported back that they were still infested. That was strange. Sure, he’d heard a few odd noises as he hunted around, but don’t you always in huge, deserted places?
He’d go in and feast. Cans and cans of food. The meats were the best. He’d even risked some of the less dodgy looking cured stuff in the cold counters. It was heaven! He’d always sneak back as much as he could carry for the group. No-one seemed to notice, or at least care that there was always more food than they’d remembered from the day before. Well, almost no-one. Jess was noticing. Not just the food, but him.
She used to look at him out of the corner of her eye when she was on watch. She went out of her way to ask how he was and what he was up to. He thought that if he’d been slightly less paranoid he might have been flattered. She was pretty and intelligent too. Usually pretty girls just found him boring. Jess was different. When he’d finally let her weedle some conversation out of him he’d discovered that she was almost as big a Sci Fi fan as he was. She’d read a load of the same stuff. She even had a slightly battered copy of Brave New World in her bag. Danny knew it had to be too good to be true.
One night, he’d waited until everyone was asleep; avoided the guards as usual, and headed down the side of the building, towards the ground. He’d planned to hit a department store tonight; reasoned there’d be some gourmet stuff in cans he could get. It was quite a trek to the ground and he had to keep focused on what he was doing. Unfortunately focus had never been one of his strong points. He was just thinking about how he’d have gone about asking Jess out before all this happened, when the pipe he was climbing down came away from the wall. A loud “shit” escaped his lips as he lunged for a nearby ledge. Slowly, very slowly he looked upwards, afraid of what he might see. The ledge was solid, but unfortunately so was the wall that had replaced what had once been a window. What was worse, it was too narrow for him to get up onto. He dangled uselessly from the tips of his fingers, no other hand hold in sight. There were no sounds from above either. No calls or cocking of shotguns. They obviously hadn’t heard him cry out. So far so good, but what the hell was he going to do now? He couldn’t just dangle here. He’d got pretty good upper body strength, despite the bite, but even he couldn’t hang on forever.
He risked looking down. He was still a great distance from the ground. No way would he survive the drop. That was sort of the point. They wanted to be as far away from “them” as possible, but that wasn’t so helpful to him now. He pushed himself away from the wall a little and checked either side of where he was hanging. The window to his right was open, although still a good distance away. If he swung over and then did a sort of dramatic flippy jumpy thing, he might be able to get his right arm to the sill. It seemed unlikely, but what the hell? He was probably dead anyway and it’s not like he had a wealth of alternatives. Danny swung, and swung a bit more and then, even though he probably should have jumped by now, swung a bit more. He took a deep breath, and launched himself. He could see everything happening in slow motion. The blood was rushing in his ears as his panic began to rise. He was going to miss, and not just by a bit, but by a whole lot. Then he saw the rope. It was hurtling towards him at speed. He willed his body towards it and, yes, caught it. Then he slammed into the wall with the force of a rhino and almost let go. Head spinning, the blood draining from his fingers, he looked up. Through blurred vision a worried face looked down at him. It was Jess.
Danny still wasn’t quite sure how he’d made it up the rope. His nose had been bleeding so badly he could barely breathe. Somehow he’d managed it and here was the girl of his dreams trying to mop a bit of it up, lit by a single lantern. She looked so sweet, looking at his nose with great concentration, slightly cross-eyed. Carefully, she checked the rest of him for breaks and gashes. He smiled at her and caught her eye for the first time.
She turned to look him in the eye, ferocious. “What the fuck did you think you were doing out there!”
It wasn’t a question. The soft concentration had gone from her eyes and she was looking at him in cold fury. “You could’ve got yourself killed!”
He tried a weak smile again, big mistake.
“You selfish bastard! We’d all have been trapped up here. Every zombie for miles around would be on our front doorstep!”
He looked away. He hadn’t thought of that. What if he had fallen? The only real reason they were safe was because there weren’t enough of them around to break down the doors at the bottom. That had happened before and they’d only just made it out alive. All it needed was a big enough group, perhaps even just twenty or so, and no matter how much junk they’d shoved down the stairwells they’d be up and everyone would be lunch.
He looked up at her. “I didn’t… I …”
To his surprise she softened. “I know” she said less ferociously. “I also know that without you our food would’ve run out weeks ago. The others don’t admit it, but I’m sure some of them suspect too. I still think you’re crazy” she actually smiled “ …and INCREDIBLY lucky.”
He couldn’t resist risking a small smile at this.
“But for God’s sake, why don’t you use a ladder!”
“Oh. I…”
“I’m beginning to get the picture.” She was beginning to remind him a little of his mother “You don’t tend to think things through, do you?”
It was a while before Danny could risk another night excursion. He couldn’t risk them smelling the blood healing on his nose. Still, it was torture. Finally he could wait no longer. He took one of the long rope ladders from the store and made his way down. It took forever. It may have been safer, but by the time he reached the bottom, every muscle was aching. He’d just started to walk towards the department store he’d planned to go before the whole rusty pipe incident, and congratulating himself on escaping unnoticed, when he heard a noise behind him. His heart leapt and he made ready to run. Behind a bin emerged a rather sheepish-looking Jess.
“Sorry.” She whispered, nervously looking around her “but your luck’s got to run out sometime. I thought I’d better watch your back.”
Danny said nothing, but sighed and nodded. He’d never been good at winning arguments with girls. They always seemed to take seconds to find the one fatal flaw that he’d missed despite weeks of planning. He was sure she’d find something convincing and right now he was too hungry to waste any more time. Jess kept her silence until they reached his destination of choice.
“You must be joking!” She said in an incredulous whisper. “That place’ll be crawling with the buggers!”
He shrugged, “Stay outside if you want.”
She hesitated, looked around her one last time, took a deep breath, and followed him round the back, through a broken window and into the shop.
It was really eerie in the shop. Mannequins stood immaculately dressed, but with a thick layer of dust coating their heads and shoulders. They looked almost like they were wearing grey epaulettes and flat caps. Danny picked his way deftly through the aisles to a floor guide. He pointed to the top of the guide, marked “food hall”. Jess said nothing, but continued to look around nervously, snapping her head towards even the slightest suggestion of a noise. Danny supposed he couldn’t blame her. He must’ve been like that the first few times. They got to the top floor, no problem, and he started loading up. Jess pulled up close to his ear. Here? He thought to himself. Really, here? He’d heard of some girls liking the danger, but this wasn’t the best of timing. Even he didn’t want to spend longer in here than they had to.
“There’s something moving,” she hissed “over there.”
He deflated slightly, but couldn’t see anything, and was just about to chalk it up to a healthy dose of paranoia when he saw it too.
“Oh shit, this way, towards that skylight.” He hissed. Maybe he did think a little ahead he thought smugly as they sped silently towards the skylight. He’d scoped the room when they’d got up here, just in case. They got up on the counters, next to the tills, but they were still too far away.
“Use me to get up.” He said, already crouching slightly to give her a leg up.
“But what about you?”
“No time” he said and thrust her upwards. Even on his shoulders, she was too short. He looked wildly around, and for a split second couldn’t see them. Then he did. This was not good. There were at least three and he thought he caught movement further away.
“Brace yourself!” and without warning he grabbed her feet and thrust her through the skylight. There was a tremendous crack and she screamed. He prayed they’d neglected to get it reinforced. He could hear scrambling and a small moan above him. They weren’t up there as well? She peered over the edge, blood pouring from her head and shoulders where she’d plunged through the glass. A small stream of blood dripped down the side of her face and splashed onto the dusty floor.
His head snapped down again at a loud moaning sound from the approaching zombies. It was like a moan of longing. He thought they must’ve stopped to see what was happening, and now, as one, they advanced. He knew it was just panic, but it looked like hundreds of them. They were coming from all directions. He could hear Jess scrabbling around on the roof and tearing noises. She was either ripping up the roof felt to try and save him, or, he didn’t want to think about it. Whatever, it was all too late. He was going to die. They all streamed towards him. He braced himself. He didn’t want to scream if she was watching. He wanted to look brave. No-one had ever thought he was brave before and somehow it seemed really important now. One was just an arms-length away. If he reached out his rotting arm he would be able to grab Danny and pull him to the floor. Then someone screamed. Oh God, please don’t let that be me, I want to be…
And then he was on the floor. His legs had given way and he had fallen backwards. He was in danger of being trampled, yes, but none of them was paying him the blindest bit of notice. What the? He managed to get himself together enough to scrabble backwards out of the crowd. The noise was unbelievable. The moans, the slurping, the grunts as they pushed each other out the way. They were… really? They were eating the blood! Jess’ blood! For a split second he was offended. Then he laughed. He looked up to see Jess looking down at him, white as a sheet. Her mouth open. Blood gently dripping down the side of her head. A couple of the zombies had noticed her. Danny gestured violently for her to get away from the edge. He prayed she’d meet nothing nasty up there. They must be able to smell her from miles around, especially when they seemed to be so hungry. He reasoned most people must be either dead or much better at hiding by now.
It was strangely easy getting home. They laid a few false blood trails and Danny was able to see they’d taken the bait. Still, she was very weak and had lost a lot of blood by the time they made it back. She didn’t speak on the long climb back. She wouldn’t see him for nearly a week, and when she did she didn’t bring it up.
Jess never came out with him again. She sometimes gave him an alibi if someone noticed he was missing, and she encouraged him to take on the more dangerous jobs (well, they weren’t dangerous for him were they?), and after a while they both put “that night” behind them. They got really close, and spent most of their time together. People began expecting them to know where the other one was. This, Danny supposed, was what a relationship was like. He kind of liked it.
Nothing stays the same forever and things were about to change again. It had looked as if things were going to be alright, but then people started getting sick. The stupid thing was that they didn’t even think it was that serious, but without antibiotics they could already see a lot of them weren’t going to make it. The only pharmacist was clear across town and getting there and back was going to be practically impossible. Finally a bunch of “the best and the bravest” volunteered. Danny tried to join them, but they were unconvinced. He’d been looking worse recently. His face was starting to get the same greyish tinge as his arm. He was starting to feel stiffness in most of his joints as well. Jess never mentioned it, but they were always very careful if she cut herself, just to be sure.
The night before the expedition, Jess and Danny were in their room watching the flicker of the lamp that miraculously never ran out of oil. Jess had claimed a small room away from the others as their own. She’d made it quite comfy too. They’d been sitting in silence for some time, Danny playing with Jess’ hair as she sat with her head on his shoulder. Danny was obviously deep in thought.
“I’ve got to tell them. They’re all going to die.” He burst out at her.
“And what about you?” she reasoned “Do you really think they’ll let you back when they find out?”
“They might surprise you.”
Jess doubted it, but she knew he was going to go no matter what she said. She tried her hardest not to cry. She tried to look supportive and told him she loved him for what he was going to do. In a way she did. In another way she thought he was selfish, wanting to be the hero and leaving her. She hoped it didn’t show.
The next day she stood numb as he told the others. At first they didn’t believe him. A lot of them looked at her, and when she didn’t say anything they started to believe he was telling the truth. A couple of the mothers held their children slightly closer to themselves than they needed to. One or two took an involuntary step backwards. This is it. Jess thought. They’ll let him do this. Perhaps even a couple of things. And then they’ll make him leave. A tear escaped down her cheek. Angrily she brushed it away. She couldn’t let Danny see. She couldn’t let him think he’d made her unhappy. She could cry later when he’d gone.
He looked back at her as he’d gone down the rope ladder. She’d smiled bravely and promised a hot meal when he got home. She wondered if he’d make it. It wasn’t just zombies out there. There were other people who shot first and asked questions later; crumbling buildings; fires. For the next couple of days she hoped and waited and occasionally cried bitterly into the night. After that she really started to worry. After a week she’d even allowed herself to think about the possibility that he wasn’t coming back. More people were getting sick, and although she knew she should feel sympathy for them, all she could really think about was Danny. It wasn’t that far. He should have made it in the first couple of days. What was taking so long?
It was a week and a half before she saw Danny again. He looked terrible. He was shambling towards them, a huge pack on his back. He looked exhausted and there was no pretending he was one of them anymore. Every exposed bit of flesh was grey. He looked as if he would fall over at any second. Still, he saw her and grinned. She smiled back and waved. The others pushed roughly past her and let down a rope. He tied the pack to it and waited as they pulled it up. When they opened it, it was clear why he’d looked so tired, why it’d taken him so long. It was full to the brim with every kind of medical supply they could need. He must’ve been to the hospital miles away to get all this stuff. They’d enough antibiotics, and in fact all sorts of other medicines, to last them for years. Jess’ heart swelled. She was so proud of him. She rushed to the edge to let down the ladder and was confused to see him walking away. Why was he walking away? She called after him and he waved up at her, then turned and continued his shambling walk away from her. She went to let down the ladder, but there were suddenly two men at her side, holding her back. She struggled and struggled, but they held her fast until Danny was far out of sight. She dropped to her knees and wept uncontrollably. The men said nothing as they headed downstairs, leaving her completely alone.
As Danny walked away he was smiling. Even though Jess was so far away he knew how proud she was of him. He hoped she couldn’t see the state he was in. He knew the others would never let him back. He just wanted her to remember him the way she’d seen him last. What he had meant to her and all the time they’d had together. He’d realised a couple of days ago that he could no longer talk. He’d tried to pet a cat. It was wandering along a wall as if nothing had changed. To this cat, the whole world was as it had been. It made him smile. When he went up to it, it purred. He went to ask it it’s name and with a real shock realised he couldn’t say a word. It all came out as a kind of floppy moan. The kind of sounds you make when the dentist has been a bit over-enthusiastic with the anaesthetic. The cat looked at him in alarm and disappeared down an alley. He’d decided then that he wasn’t going to put up a fight when they asked him to leave. He’d expected some kind of thank you, though, but the only one who even looked him in the eyes was Jess. He guessed they were scared and a very small and nasty bit of him thought they might be ashamed. Still, he had a plan.
Before the incident he used to love walking in the countryside. It always made him feel like he’d left the rest of the world behind him and it was just him and the open road. Corny, he knew, but then maybe that was exactly what he was: Corny. He was going to walk as far as his legs would carry him, lie down in some meadow or perhaps by a stream, and close his eyes.
He was impressed with himself for quite how far he’d gone before he couldn’t go any further. It felt like a nice place to be. He’d found a nook in a hillside away from the wind. Here he could be at peace, he thought, as he shut his eyes. He wondered if what he’d done would have been enough to make his Mum proud. He hoped it was.
It was a while before he opened his eyes again and he could hear voices. A man and an almost ridiculously pregnant woman were walking towards him. They couldn’t see him through the long grass, but they were heading straight towards him. At this rate they were going to walk right into him. No! This wasn’t how it was supposed to be! He was in so much pain now, and he just wanted to be left alone. A frustrated groan escaped him and they froze. The man pushed the woman back and ran towards him. For a long moment they both looked at each other, the man pointing a rifle right between his eyes. Then he lowered it.
“It’s fine.” He called out in a relieved voice. “This one’s almost dead. You can come and have a look if you want to.”
Warily, the woman made her way towards him and peered down.
Instantly, her expression changed. “Oh, look at him. He looks so sad. It’s hard to believe he was ever evil.”
Danny felt tears well up in his eyes, he wasn’t even sure if he could still cry, but he was going to give it a go.
“Is he…is he, crying?”
“He can’t be” said the man looking at him with a mixture of pity and horror.
The man put his arm around her as they both stood and stared at him for a long time. Danny looked up at them, unsure what to do. He just wished they’d leave him alone, but there was nothing he could do about it. He would just have to wait it out and hope they went on their way soon. He found himself wondering where these two had come from. There was no way she could have walked all the way from town, not in her condition. He looked back towards the way they had come, wondering if there was a house or village nearby that he’d not noticed. Then Danny saw something move in the distance behind them. He couldn’t be sure at first, his eyes, though mercifully the last to fail, were going the way of the rest of his body, but then he saw another something. There was no mistaking the shambling, yet determined movement. The man and woman were totally focused on him. She was certainly in no fit state to run. They needed every second they had to get away. He had to do something. He had to warn them. He tried to move, but his body felt like a decrepit puddle. Then he made a decision. He hoped it would be enough. He was finally going to do something extraordinary. With one last, enormous effort, he managed to lift his head and shoulders off the ground with a huge grunting cry. The woman screamed and moved off, away from the distant figures. Danny heard a crack, like the whip of a giant, and everything went black.
So that's my second post. I hope you liked it. Comments/criticisms/blatant flattery welcomed. See you again next month.
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